On Being an influence

You don’t need a large auditorium or a big crowd to leave an impact in the lives of people. You don’t need to speak a thousand words to comfort a distressed heart. That’s why the short sentence “I love you” does a lot to the recipient than a conversation containing so much words.
That small stage with a single audience has the grandest opportunity you could ever imagine and the greatest imprint you could ever fathom.

Few years ago as an undergraduate in the university of Lagos, there were times I was told to coordinate one task or the other. And you know even though I was shy to at times, ‘we’ just had to make it work (smiles). Other times, we had evangelism obligations in campus fellowship. Those times are cherished. Sadly, they can’t be lived again. There are things I wish I had done differently those times. But it’s no use crying over spilled milk now is it? We learn from past experiences and move on.

So late last year, I had someone chat me up on Telegram. And she goes, “Hello. How are you? This is xxx.”
And I reply, “Hello xxx.
Good evening. I’m very well, thank you. But I’m not quite sure if I know you?
Then she replied (with a smile), “You probably won’t remember me.
I’m a 400 level student of xyz.
I met you in my 100 level, you invited me to ccCF.”

Then I recalled immediately and with excitement, I go, “xxxxxxxxx
I remember you dearie
I do!!!
That day you came for registration. You were with your mom!

Yayyyyyy you’re in final year…
Glorryyyyy!!!
I actually saw you in one of zzz’s pictures on her status. I was trying to remember your name but I couldn’t (sad face). And now you reached out. How the Spirit works!!!!
It’s good to hear from you (hugs).
How’ve the exams been?
(lol… see my long response)
Then the conversation went on…

Another conversation I had with one of my close friends, she was telling me how we met and how I was so welcoming and made her feel loved. Apparently, it was her first time in the environment. When she narrated the ordeal, I couldn’t even remember but I was glad someone was blessed by an action we’d consider ‘insignificant’.

Though memories like these gladden my heart, I know I also have those who met me in a really bad mood and the impression they have about me still lingers. You probably share the same sentiments. That’s life!

There was a time in school still, I wrote a poem to commemorate our sisters thanksgiving in campus fellowship. My mistake was I didn’t inform the coordinators before time. After I’d written and perfected it, I shared with my brother and my sis who I usually share my write-ups with for vetting and honest critiques. And my brother goes, “why would you write this kind of piece for campus fellowship? Are they paying you?”
(Laughing really hard)… you get that too, yeah?. Such comments from very well meaning loved ones (hugs).
And I’m like, “they don’t have to pay me to get good stuff. (serious but not so serious face)
My sis said it was great and gave a few other corrections on how to pronounce some words like ‘pursuit’. I can never forget that scenario. She kept telling me it was ‘paw-soot’ not ‘paw-sweet’. It took series of rehearsals before the right pronunciation stuck. Dunno why it took so long (sigh).
My roomies and my sis were the best vibe I needed at the time. They kept chipping in how great the piece was and couldn’t wait to watch me present it grand style (not until the ‘disappointment’…sad face). They were my first audience (and later my only audience).

On the day of the thanksgiving, I told my choir leader I had a piece I’d like to present. (I was in the choir unit). She said to relay to the sisters’ coordinator. It took a lot of courage to do that because I’d rather talk to a closer ‘exco’ (it’s short for executive) than someone who I had a distant relationship with. Anyways, I told her but she said I couldn’t because it was too late. (I sort of saw that coming). She didn’t say much and she left in a hurry.

I was heart broken but I had to shake off the hurt and put up a smile because it was Sisters’ Day and I had my roomies with my twin around too so I didn’t want to give them a wrong impression. Asides that, the thanksgiving went well to the glory of God. My roomies and my twin were cross I didn’t get a chance to present (it was like their cheering morale had been made sour). But then I had to stay strong still and comfort myself with the fact that they listened at least.
The poem is titled “Growing into Graceful Cornerstones” (in line with the theme and bible reference from Psalm 144). Here’s an excerpt from the poem;

…
‘I am worth more than rubies
Nurtured and schooled under paragons
I was tutored to be unslothful
Awakening to every call to good work
I refuse to yield to any pull of sluggishness.’…
‘I am one of so many cornerstones
Graced by all manner of adornment
Not all that different from my fellows
But rather distinct because I am me
I am being groomed to serve support to my groom.’ (and it continues…)

I have learnt to do the best I can. It doesn’t really matter if it’s little. I had thought I didn’t get the chance to present but actually, I did. If I had written it and no one read it or heard it, then I didn’t truly get the chance to present it. But my brother, my twin and all my roomies read and heard. That was an audience! And that was the audience I needed at the time.

There are few people I really bless God for having our paths cross. It’s not that I don’t thank God for the rest but these ones are really special. These ones are the ones I’ve had direct contact with. These ones know my weakness but still welcome and drill me to have me become better because they see my potentials. These are true influencers. Yes there are those at the fore fronts who pull the crowd with the words they speak. But you see, the ones behind the scenes are they who do the greatest influencing. In your little corner, in your little actions, be the best you can. You don’t need to be in a formal gathering to muster all the poise and grace you can.

You see, Everyone won’t mount a pulpit or a podium to be influential. Influence is not measured by how well you can speak nor by how many persons you speak to. It is measured by how many people are sincerely impacted through your message. By how many persons in that crowd leave and live a changed life from the message shared. If it’s just one person, you’ve just influenced one person. In my opinion, a smaller audience is better because the proximity of the audience and the influencer is well bridged. So there’s a closer and passionate desire from both ends.

If you’re called to be a support to a large audience influencer, do your best as unto God not to man. In fact, in some cases, the support is an influencer to the large audience influencer. Not everyone would have a large audience. Even if it’s just a person, speak those words and do so passionately. Your impact would go a long way. And then that one person spreads the impact to two, two to more and then everyone’s reached by the words from you to a single-man audience. Know that you’ve reached everyone. Take comfort in the truth that the Lord has made it so because He understands the law of multiplication.

That which He has committed to you, however little, do it well. Let Him find you doing that which He has committed to you. Don’t struggle to get the biggest audience when you’ve been called to a little. When a large audience influencer and a support or single/small- audience influencer are both doing what God has called them to, they are considered faithful. Remember to whom much is given, much is expected. God gives duties to each man according to their ability. So don’t compare yourself to another man. If you’re a ‘babe’, take your milk and be satisfied (be nourished and grow therein) and as you grow by staying committed and diligent, more assignments would be added as the Lord deems fit.

If you’re a ‘grownup’, take your strong meat and be satisfied (be nourished and grow therein). Don’t distort the order!

There’s no one without a shortcoming, I have a lot. But we are getting better by the grace of God. You cannot get better if you don’t subject yourself to change. You aren’t God who’s not subject to change. Every one has weights to shed off. So don’t forget, in that little corner where you are, give off your little ‘light’. Brighten the corner where you are. In your conversations, your reactions, your dressing, whatever it is, know you’re an influence. So be an influence!

Receive grace,
Taiye Funmilola Kadiri